The noise around me does not easily sway me. Over the years, I took pride in keeping myself together as things around me devolved into chaos. Now, after two eternities of holding everything together, my resolve and heart finally seem to be giving in to the constant noise. It might be my age, or the mileage on my mind, running in overdrive for eternity. I guess it has finally reached its breaking point.
I don’t know what a broken mind looks like; I only deal in the soul side of the business. As I am the dealer of those who pass over, leaving behind the mind and the body. So, in this particular circumstance, I find myself in quite a quandary. Uncharted territory of confusing options. From the countless souls I have dealt in, few in a bargain while few resigned; I never ever cared or bothered about their state of mind and body they would leave behind. Not my area of expertise. Not my concern. So, as I thought, before last night’s events.
We all come with a defined purpose and responsibility. Our actions are accounted for, as it is the purpose we are bound to serve. Shall I deviate? A question bound to be encountered at least once in an eternity. I am not special. Although the realms of the countless worlds and universes like to think so, their perception, not mine. When such a question was presented in front of me, I hesitated for a moment, but the next I defected. One grave mistake, in a lifetime of unyielding service. An intrusion that was meant to serve a suffering soul, to rid it of the misery, prematurely, with no regard for its body and mind. My sin, to indulge in the otherworldly affairs, unaware of the depths to which the beings emote their own for their finite existence. For those who are early in their journeys. For me, it all resembled an intersection in an infinite cycle. Unbeknownst to those who held power over me, I took charge, miscalculating the cost of what this world puts on the body and the mind, falsely considering myself to be duty-bound, and snatched the soul. It was in an instant. Not to be undone.
Here and now I stand between the gallows of that which will punish me for my sins. I ponder to myself: the skills that define me consume me. For what I was best known as, I stare at it in someone else, as empty as they may seem to me now.